Friday, July 20, 2012

Wasting Your Time

Today, I felt it.

The anxiety that comes with not doing a blog post.

I mean, having the time and the energy to do everything else, but willfully not writing because I didn't feel like committing to it, and then feeling anxious, a little panicky even, because I am not getting it done.

Which is dumb because I started this blog to become totally rich and famous, and I'm almost there. 

And now I'm breaking my most important rule when I started this blog: Do not EVER write about the process of writing.  It is boring and stupid, and even mom doesn't want to read about that, and she comprises roughly one-fourth of my audience.

Taking time to wash fingerprints off of windows?  Got it.  Doing three half-loads of laundry?  No prob -  I got two hours for that.  Dilly-dallying on Facebook and changing your profile picture four times today?  Jeez.  Who DOESN'T make time for that?

But for me to find an interesting subject, put those thoughts down, do some light editing, and post it to the blog?  Excuse me, I can't possibly do that. 

So I put it off for days, much like I do when there's a huge bill to pay and I just can't bring myself to pay it right away.  Which I guess sounds like I don't pay my bills on time.  Which I DO.  Don't even think about spreading rumors.  It's just... parting with a big hunk of cash is sometimes the last thing I want to do, so I'll go around and straighten up all the curtains in the house and pick all the lint off the floor with my fingernails before I write that check.

Which is how I feel about writing.  Sometimes putting thoughts into words and making them seem coherent to others is a huge task for me.  And irrationally, the more days that go by, the more pressure I put on myself to write, and the more panicked I feel about it.

So today, I did. 

Sorry about that.


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