Friday, November 16, 2012

Get It Together

Adults are supposed to be with it.

And by with it, I mean, have it together, know what’s going on, able to do things, get things done. 

At least that’s what I used to think, back when I was hilarious.

As an adult, I have never felt so inept in certain situations, because I have spent a lifetime seeing other people get things done.  My ineptitude comes primarily in the form of remembering.  Remembering not dates and names, but daily tasks, like putting on deodorant and making dentist appointments for my family.

Wait.  What were we talking about again?

As an adult, I cannot remember anything.  I blame it on the children, of course.  Mom brain is such a tired cliché but as I always say, clichés are clichés because they are cliché.  And again, cliché.  I have spent so many brain cells trying to keep other people alive that I have no more to spare for my own survival.

My husband is at the end of his rope with me.  Just the other day we went out to lunch, and as we were driving to the restaurant we discussed getting gas for the car and going to the bank and the hardware store.   After lunch I forgot about our errands.  As I drove away from the restaurant on the way back home, he reminded me of the errands, and re-routed me to the bank.  After the bank, he steered me to the gas station, and again to the hardware store.  Once in the store, he told me that he was going around back to pick up his purchase, and left the store.  I strolled outside to get in the car, and was more than a little nervous that the car wasn’t there.  I wandered around the parking lot in circles until he picked me up at the curb. 

At that point I guess he figured that if he was ever going to get home in a timely manner, he needed to be in charge.

It’s particularly bad with the children, and affects my validity as a parent.  Recently we punished our son for something.  I say something because I’m not sure what it was.  I know that the punishment was that he couldn’t hang out with his friends after school for a week.  Was it this week or last week?  Or was it no electronics for the day?  All I know is that my son was supposed to be punished, and he hung out with his friends after school twice this week AND I gave him extra time on his electronics yesterday.

And how many times do I open the dryer and find an old load of laundry in there?  When did that…?  How did I go without…?  Didn’t anyone notice…?  Sigh.

Maybe it’s not normal.  Maybe I’m regressing.

Maybe I’m not really quite an adult.  The time I spent eating candy and looking up funny pictures on the internet today seem to point in that direction.

Maybe I'd be more productive if I didn't
waste so much time taking self-portraits.

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