Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Criminal

The first notes of the song rang in my ears, and I turned the volume up.  The windows were down in the car because I still haven’t gotten the AC fixed, and it’s July already.

I knew the words even before she started singing.  The memories surfaced, and even though they aren’t very cheerful, I left the radio where it was.  It’s still a good song, a leftover from my angry twenties.

Those were the days when I sought out music from angsty females who were hurt and who wanted to tell everyone about it, no matter how shocking and ugly.  The pain and I sang along with these women under cover of whatever apartment I lived in at the time, and whatever car was my companion.  That was usually as close as I got to expressing it.

Today I sang along because it’s in my range, and because I know all the words.

I’ve been a bad, bad girl
I've been careless with a delicate man

Next to me, my ten-year-old, full of swagger and sass, interrupted my concentration on the words and the 90’s: “Oh no, she DI’ ‘INT!!”

I laughed.  Oh, yes, she did.

An old song can bring you right back to the memory of a time, usually a memory of who you were at a time.

I am thankful that my girl was there to remind me that I’m not in my angry twenties anymore.



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Note: Wondering about the song? Criminal by Fiona Apple.  She's still angry, I think.


8 comments:

  1. I also remember that song from that time. Other than not having wrinkles, I'm trying to think of anything good about my twenties. Okay, that isn't fair. After my divorce, my 20s got so much better.

    I love how music brings us back in time to a former version of us. It makes me grateful at how much more I like myself now than at pretty much any other time.

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    1. I agree. My twenties were all over the place. And they seemed to go on forever. Thirties whizzed by. I'm sure forties will be just as fast, if not faster. And with more wrinkles, of course.

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  2. My favorite song when I was in my 20's? "I'm a Bitch". Oh yes. :)

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    1. Ha! I'm singing it in my head now. Thanks for that. :)

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  3. You? An angry twenty-something? Nah!

    Your daughter sounds cool.

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    1. Thank you - I think she's cool. So much cooler than I was then. And now.

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  4. How is that I've never heard that song??? My Husband knew it...I didn't. Somehow I missed Fiona Apple.

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    1. I worked in a record store during that time, and listened to a lot of depressing, sub-popular music. Now I listen to the music my kids listen to, and it's just as angry but peppier.

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