And by with it, I mean, have it together, know what’s going
on, able to do things, get things done.
At least that’s what I used to think, back when I was
hilarious.
As an adult, I have never felt so inept in certain
situations, because I have spent a lifetime seeing other people get things
done. My ineptitude comes primarily in
the form of remembering. Remembering not
dates and names, but daily tasks, like putting on deodorant and making dentist
appointments for my family.
Wait. What were we
talking about again?
As an adult, I cannot remember anything. I blame it on the children, of course. Mom brain is such a tired cliché but as I
always say, clichés are clichés because they are cliché. And again, cliché. I have spent so many brain cells trying to
keep other people alive that I have no more to spare for my own survival.
My husband is at the end of his rope with me. Just the other day we went out to lunch, and as we
were driving to the restaurant we discussed getting gas for the car and going
to the bank and the hardware store. After lunch I forgot about our errands. As I drove away from the restaurant on the
way back home, he reminded me of the errands, and re-routed me to the
bank. After the bank, he steered me to the
gas station, and again to the hardware store.
Once in the store, he told me that he was going around back to pick up
his purchase, and left the store. I strolled
outside to get in the car, and was more than a little nervous that the car
wasn’t there. I wandered around the parking
lot in circles until he picked me up at the curb.
At that point I guess he figured that if he was ever going
to get home in a timely manner, he needed to be in charge.
It’s particularly bad with the children, and affects my
validity as a parent. Recently we
punished our son for something. I say
something because I’m not sure what it was.
I know that the punishment was that he couldn’t hang out with his
friends after school for a week. Was it
this week or last week? Or was it no
electronics for the day? All I know is
that my son was supposed to be punished, and he hung out with his friends after
school twice this week AND I gave him extra time on his electronics yesterday.
And how many times do I open the dryer and find an old load of
laundry in there? When did that…? How did I go without…? Didn’t anyone notice…? Sigh.
Maybe it’s not normal.
Maybe I’m regressing.
Or.
Maybe I’m not really quite an adult. The time I spent eating candy and looking up
funny pictures on the internet today seem to point in that direction.
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Maybe I'd be more productive if I didn't waste so much time taking self-portraits. |
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